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unmowngrassI sleep a lot these days
My blood sugar gets low.
My iron levels do too.
I'm generally run down.
So half past five in the evening, especially if I've had a busy day, you'll find me passing into slumberland on the couch. Too short to stretch out but with loads of squashy cushions. Warm, most of the time. I get a pain in my neck because the arm of the couch is too high, and a pain in my hips from laying on my side, but nonetheless around half past eight I wake up from asleep to drowsy, to that sweet happy-languid state, wrapped in remembrances of soft, warm, tender dreams. And for a minute it's glorious.
.
I don't sleep well these days
Not enough water.
Not enough physical activity to tire me out.
Too much caffeine, too much screen time.
And putting off the loneliest moment of the day.
Even with my Prayer Songs playlist and my teddy bear.
So at two in the morning, or later -- I try not to let it be too much later -- I'm resigning myself to the need to get to bed. Uncomfortable mattress, lumpy pillows. Cold, usually, because the wall I cuddle into is exterior. I get a sore throat because (I think) I sleep with my mouth open. An ache in my bad vertebrae for sleeping facing the ceiling. And at half past eight in the morning -- or half past eleven, if I've nothing to get up for -- plus the 1-3 times I wake in the night -- you'll find me eyes heavy lidded but mind so alert, racing. Vigilantly checking about, haunted by the ghosts, by the echoes, the flashes of the bad dreams. And for a minute it's scary.
My blood sugar gets low.
My iron levels do too.
I'm generally run down.
So half past five in the evening, especially if I've had a busy day, you'll find me passing into slumberland on the couch. Too short to stretch out but with loads of squashy cushions. Warm, most of the time. I get a pain in my neck because the arm of the couch is too high, and a pain in my hips from laying on my side, but nonetheless around half past eight I wake up from asleep to drowsy, to that sweet happy-languid state, wrapped in remembrances of soft, warm, tender dreams. And for a minute it's glorious.
.
I don't sleep well these days
Not enough water.
Not enough physical activity to tire me out.
Too much caffeine, too much screen time.
And putting off the loneliest moment of the day.
Even with my Prayer Songs playlist and my teddy bear.
So at two in the morning, or later -- I try not to let it be too much later -- I'm resigning myself to the need to get to bed. Uncomfortable mattress, lumpy pillows. Cold, usually, because the wall I cuddle into is exterior. I get a sore throat because (I think) I sleep with my mouth open. An ache in my bad vertebrae for sleeping facing the ceiling. And at half past eight in the morning -- or half past eleven, if I've nothing to get up for -- plus the 1-3 times I wake in the night -- you'll find me eyes heavy lidded but mind so alert, racing. Vigilantly checking about, haunted by the ghosts, by the echoes, the flashes of the bad dreams. And for a minute it's scary.
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Date: 2021-10-28 02:17 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-10-28 05:55 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-10-29 03:32 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-10-29 04:00 pm (UTC)Even on sunny, quiet weekend days, where I have no reason necessarily to be awake in the middle of the afternoon, I'll force myself to not nap if I'm the mood for one because it seems like even a short half-hour nap will make it so I lose four hours of sleep that night.
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Date: 2021-11-01 01:48 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-10-28 09:59 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-10-29 03:33 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-10-29 04:02 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-11-01 01:55 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-11-01 01:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-11-01 02:15 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-11-01 02:45 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-11-01 03:05 pm (UTC)I've never played the sims, but I think if I did I'd just build all the houses, not do the people... . Does the sims have an 'endgame'as such, or does it just go on forever?
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Date: 2021-11-01 03:39 pm (UTC)I actually much prefer just building fancy houses, and have a separate save file where I just build houses and do nothing with them. But that's part of the fun of the game, too. If all you want to do is build houses, you can! If all you wanna just create people and dress them up and that's it, you can! It is a MASSIVE time-sink, however, so I tend to go several days without playing lest I ignore all of my responsibilities in the real world.
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Date: 2021-10-30 01:07 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-11-01 07:45 pm (UTC)I know the annoying-ness of not being able to sleep, especially once in that cycle of thinking about not sleeping
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Date: 2021-11-02 05:36 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-11-02 11:20 am (UTC)- Erulisse (one L)
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Date: 2021-11-02 05:37 pm (UTC)Thanks for reading.
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Date: 2021-11-02 05:30 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-11-02 05:57 pm (UTC)Thank you for your compliments, I appreciate your feedback on the writing and also your lovely warm welcome, thank you.
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Date: 2021-11-02 06:02 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-11-02 07:03 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-11-08 10:30 pm (UTC)If you can't afford a new mattress, would a new mattress pad help? And some new pillows that aren't lumpy?
Another thing that might help would be to put a barrier between you and that outside wall. More pillows or cushions, a rolled-up blanket, something.
I hope this gets better soon!
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Date: 2021-11-09 03:12 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-11-09 08:24 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-11-09 09:43 pm (UTC)